Your Inner Circle, Will they speak hard truth?

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As leaders we are going to make bad decisions and suffer failures due to that. What we need around us, in our inner circle, is people who are willing to speak hard truth to us out of care and concern for us. To see an example of how not to be helpful to your leaders, see my post here. King David had made some bad decisions, his friend Nathan came to him to speak some hard truth. Nathan used a parable to get the point across.


In 2 Samuel, chapter 12, verses 1 thru 15. We are told a parable by the prophet Nathan. Now Nathan was sent by God to confront David for his multiple sins, including murder. Now that's some hard truth that I hope that I never have to confront anyone about. So, let's see how Nathan handled the situation. 


¹ The LORD sent Nathan to David. When he came to him, he said, “There were two men in a certain town, one rich and the other poor. ² The rich man had a very large number of sheep and cattle, ³ but the poor man had nothing except one little ewe lamb he had bought. He raised it, and it grew up with him and his children. It shared his food, drank from his cup and even slept in his arms. It was like a daughter to him.⁴ “Now a traveler came to the rich man, but the rich man refrained from taking one of his own sheep or cattle to prepare a meal for the traveler who had come to him. Instead, he took the ewe lamb that belonged to the poor man and prepared it for the one who had come to him.”⁵ David burned with anger against the man and said to Nathan, “As surely as the LORD lives, the man who did this deserves to die! ⁶ He must pay for that lamb four times over, because he did such a thing and had no pity.”⁷ Then Nathan said to David, “You are the man!  ( Nathan explains to David the consequences of his sin, Skip to Verse 13 ), ¹³ Then David said to Nathan, “I have sinned against the LORD.” Nathan replied, “The LORD has taken away your sin. You are not going to die.. http://biblesearch.americanbible.org/NIV/2Sam/12/
Now David may not have listened to Nathan had he came right up to him and spoke the truth to him. Nathan was wise to tell David a story that he knew David would sympathize with and listen. 
We would do well to learn from this example when we are the one's who have to approach our leaders or friends. Yes, the truth has to be spoken, but it's the delivery that really determines how they will receive your truth and counsel. 
I also want to examine the fact that no failure is final, Yes, you will suffer the consequences of it. But, it is not final. How do we recover quicker from a major failure?

• Own up to your failures: Many leaders feel that they have to hide or conceal their failures. It's much easier to deal with a failure if you admit it and get it out into the open. Additionally, the consequences are usually less then if you try to hide it.

• Show forgiveness to your people: When we show forgiveness and grace to our people when they fail or make mistakes, we empower them to do the same when we fail. If your on your pedestal all the time, the first time you fall off it, not too many people will be giving you a helping hand.

• Be accountable and responsible for your actions: When leaders hold themselves accountable it's a great example to our people. It also adds creditability to the leader when holding others accountable for their actions.

• Be humble and willing to change: When we show our people that we are humble and teachable it empowers them to come to us and unleash their creativity. We allow them to see that we don't assume that it's our way or the highway.

• Learn from failure: Whether it's you or one of your people, focus on the failure and the dynamics of how it happened. Don't focus on the person and turn it into a witch hunt. Record and pass along your findings to others, so they can learn from it as well. 

Have you ever failed? How do we fail forward instead of on our backs? Please share your experiences, I get great delight in discovering others points of view. It truly helps me to learn and become better as well. Thank you. 

Related posts: Is yes, the only thing you know how to say? ; After the failure, now what? 

Forgive and learn from it ; Accountability, are you holding yourself accountable?

The puzzle pieces

As I mentioned in yesterdays Post, I am talking about mentor leadership. Up until now, I have spoken more about groups and teams vice individuals. Yes, the groups and teams make up the whole picture, but we have to get the individual pieces in place for our teams to shine. How do we get the pieces to fit, so the picture is clear?

Positions of Trust

Lovrencg

Going to the boss and explaining to them that they have made a bad decision is not an enviable place to be. If you've pulled them out of the fire in the past they are a lot more likely to listen. But what if you have been wrong before?